3/30 Parents

3/30 - Describe your relationship with your parents

Truth be told, the relationship with my parents has been difficult at times.  I can't say i had a difficult childhood.  Not any more than any normal child.  We had fights, and expectations, and times when we learned from each other.  We actually had some really awesome moments, and made some really awesome memories.  Trips to Missouri, New York, Chicago, Florida, the cruise, Disney world.  Lots of good times.  But when i was a teenager i was difficult.  I never felt good enough for them, and it always felt like their expectations of me grew stricter and stricter.  I felt pressure from all sides with them.  I knew they loved me, but they weren't sure how to handle me and the things i did and said, and i didn't know how to talk to them and help them understand me better.  Now that i've graduated and married and had two girls, things are a bit different.  We view each other with more respect: Me because i realize how hard they had it with my sister and I, and they because they realize that i am stronger and more grounded than they originally believed me to be.  We aren't around each other all the time, so we can't get on each others nerves as bad.  We make the most of the time we do get together, and avoid subjects of conflict.  As we get older, all around, we realize more and more about each other.  The distance between us makes a big difference, on both sides.  I often wish i could see more of them, but also know that there's a fine line between visiting enough to enjoy each other, and visiting too much and grating on each others nerves. 

I hope that they know how much i love them, and how much i appreciate everything they've ever done for us.  For all the help they've given us through the years.  i wish we could pay them back, but there isn't a way to repay everything they've done.  At least, no way that would be enough.  I hope to get to see them again soon.  Hopefully things work out, and we can visit this summer and actually get to enjoy the visit, instead of this day tripping stuff we've done the last couple times.  But i guess we will wait and see. 

I am thankful for my parents.  Even through the hard times together, they always made sure we had a roof over our head, clothes on our back, food in our stomach, and love. And even though at times i was difficult, i hope they know i appreciate all of that.