I knew when I typed this one into the list that it was going to be a VERY difficult post for me. Those who truly know me know the things in my past, and why this is so hard. So please, please, be gentle. Read it with love, and realize that I'm working on it every single day.
31 your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with it
The truth is - NO. I am honestly NOT comfortable with my body.
That being said, let me explain.
I am by no means fat. Not even a little - not really. The truth of the matter is that the only thing that REALLY needs work is my tummy area. And it's just because I've had two kids and I have MS - and the two have combined to create a tummy that I HATE.
It took FOREVER to get boobs, haha. Took getting preggers before I even started to have a set. I used to be able to go without a bra before I had my daughter. Sad huh? But I did finally get them, and now after my second I can finally say I have a chest, haha. Yeah yeah. I know. But It makes me super happy to finally be able to fill out some of the awesome shirts I've had for a while.
My legs and arms are pretty good. I work on them all the time, so they haven't had a chance to really get too bad.
But my stomach. UGH my stomach. It's hard for me to really work on it because of the way my legs hurt all the time. I can do a few things, and for a short amount of time, and then they start to hurt and go weak and it's hard to do ANYTHING else. I'm trying to find things to do that I can keep up with, but It's REALLY hard. Any ideas would be great.
Now, I know I do things that aren't always healthy. Some days it's a struggle just to eat twice a day because I feel like everything I put into my body is going to just go straight to my tummy. Thankfully I have a pretty darn good support system in place that helps me. A hubby that "forces" me to eat. Friends that remind me how beautiful I am when I feel ugly. And kids that hug me when I'm having a bad day.
Truth - I HATE IT. With a passion. I know better. My logical brain knows that it's bad. I understand that it's bad for me. I know what It can do to me. Hell, I went through that period in high school, and just after. I sat at 95 lbs for YEARS - so skinny that I wore size zero jeans forever. So I KNOW that it's bad. But in that moment, when I'm faced with eating, the illogical brain takes over.
I'm working on it. I'm getting better. Have been for years. Just have some hard periods some times. And I'm just thankful that I have such amazing people in my life who are understanding of all of it.
LOVE YOU GUYS
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