Safe Coping Skills

I had my appointment with Red Rock today. And I'm glad I'm taking the steps to get the help I need. It's scary for sure.  But I know it's something I've probably needed to do for a very long time.  I've been holding things in for too long, and they are starting to eat me up inside. SOO, yeah.

I have my first REAL appointment on the 26th bright and early.

I did hear some information today that actually makes a lot of sense when I think about it. They think a big part of my problem is PTSD!  That would make a LOT of sense. I mean, after everything I went through as a kid/ teenager it's a wonder it's not worse than it is right now.

But anyway, she gave me some papers that have some pretty awesome stuff on it, so I thought I'd share.  They are safe coping skills.  PLEASE share this with anybody you know that could use some help!  I want to be able to help anybody I can that might be going through something difficult. It's not easy.  It's not easy AT ALL.  And knowing these things might help someone else. I know they will surely help me.

It's a pretty long list. So just take your time and read through it. There are a LOT of things in here that we can do on a daily basis to help us heal!

SAFE COPING SKILL

 

ASK FOR HELP - Reach out to someone safe. 

INSPIRE YOURSELF - carry something positive (ex poem) or negative( photo of friend who overdosed). 

LEAVE A BAD SCENE - When things go wrong, get out. 

PERSIST - never, never, never give up. 

HONESTLY - Secrets and lying are the core of PTSD and substance abuse; honesty heals them. 

CRY - Let yourself cry. It will not last forever.  

CHOOSE SELF-RESPSCT - choose whatever will make you like yourself tomorrow. 

TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR BODY - Healthy eating, exercise, safe sex. 

LIST YOUR OPTIONS -  In any situation, you have choices. 

CREATE MEANING - remind yourself what you are living for: your children? Love? Truth? Justice? God? 

DO THE BEST YOU CAN WITH WHAT YOU HAVE - Make the most of available opportunities. 

SET A BOUNDARY - So "NO" to protect yourself. 

COMPASSION -  Listen to yourself with respect and care. 

WHEN IN DOUBT, DO WHAT'S HARDEST - The most difficult path is invariably the right one. 

TALK YOURSELF THROUGH IT - Self-talk helps in difficult times. 

IMAGINE - Create a mental picture that helps you to feel different.

NOTICE THE CHOICE POINT - In slow motion, notice the exact moment when you chose a substance. 

PACE YOURSELF - if overwhelmed, go slower. If stagnant, go faster. 

STAY SAFE - Do whatever you need to do to put your safety above all.  

SEEK UNDERSTANDING, NOT BLAME - listen to your behavior. Blaming prevents growth. 

IF ONE WAY DOESN'T WORK, TRY ANOTHER - as if in a maze, turn a corner and try a new path. 

LINK PTSD AND SUBSTANCE ABUSE - Recognize substances as an attempt to self-medicate. 

ALONE IS BETTER THAN A BAD RELATIONSHIP - if only treaters are safe for now, that's ok. 

CREATE A NEW STORY - You are the author of your life. Be the hero who overcomes adversity. 

AVOID AVOIDABLE SUFFERING - prevent bad situations in advance. 

ASK OTHERS - ask others if your belief is accurate. 

GET ORGANIZED - you'll feel more in control with "to-do" lists and a clean house. 

WATCH FOR DANGER SIGNS - face a problem before it becomes huge. Notice red flags. 

HEALING ABOVE ALL - Focus on what matters. 

TRY SOMETHING, ANYTHING - a good plan today is better than perfect one tomorrow. 

DISCOVERRY - find out whether your assumption is true, rather than staying in your head. 

ATTEND TREATMENT - AA, Self-help, therapy, medications, groups - anything that helps you going. 

CREATE A BUFFER - Put something between you and danger (eg, time distance) -

SAY WHAT YOU REALLY THINK - you'll feel closer to others (but only do this with safe people). 

LISTEN TO YOUR NEEDS - no more neglect - really hear what you need. 

MOVE TOWARDS YOUR OPPOSITE - for example, if you are too dependent, try being more independent. 

REPLAY THE SCENE - review a negative event. What can you do differently next time? 

NOTICE THE COST - What is the price of substance abuse in your life? 

STRUCTURE YOUR DAY - A productive schedule keeps you on track and connected to the world. 

SET AN ACTION PLAN - be specific, set a deadline, and let others know about it. 

PROTECT YOURSELF - put up a shield against destructive people, bad environments, and substances. 

SOOTHING TALK - talk to yourself very gently (as if to a friend or small child) 

THINK OF CONSEQUENCES - really see the impact for tomorrow, next week, or next year. 

TRUST THE PROCESS - just keep moving forward, the only way out is through. 

WORK THE MATERIAL - The more you practice and participate, the quicker the healing.  

INTEGRATE THE SPLIT SELF - Accept all sides of yourself; they are there for a reason. 

EXPECT GROWTH TO FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE - if it feels awkward or difficult, you're doing it right. 

REPLACE DESTRUCTIVE ACTIVITIES - eat candy instead of getting high. 

PRETEND YOU LIKE YOURSELF - see how different the day feels. 

FOCUS ON NOW - do what you can to make today better. Don't get overwhelmed by the past or future. 

PRAISE YOURSELF - notice what you did right. this is the most powerful method of growth. 

OBSERVE REPETEATING PATTERNS - try to notice and understand your reenactments. 

SELF-NURTURE - do something that you enjoy. 

PRACTICE DELAY - if you can't totally prevent a self-destructive act, at least delay it as long as possible.

LET GO OF DESTRUCTIVE RELATIONSHIPS - if it can't be fixed, detach. 

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY - take an active, not a passive, approach. 

SET A DEADLINE - make it happen by setting a date. 

MAKE A COMMITTMENT - promise yourself to do what's right to help your recovery. 

RETHINK  - think in a way that helps you feel better. 

DETACH FROM EMOTIONAL PAIN - distract, walk away, change the channel

LEARN FROM EXPERIENCE - seek wisdom that can help you next time

SOLVE THE PROBLEM - don't take it personally when things go wrong. Try just to seek a solution.

USE KINDER LANGUAGE - make your language less harsh

EXAMINE THE EVIDENCE - evaluate both sides of the picture

PLAN IT OUT  - take the time to think ahead. It's the opposite of impulsivity

IDENTIFY THE BELIEF - example: should, deprivation reasoning.

REWARD YOURSELF - find a healthy way to celebrate anything you do right.

CREATE NEW "TAPES" - literally take a tape recorder and record a new way of thinking to play back.

FIND RULES TO LIVE BY - remember a phrase that works for you

SETBACKS ARE NOT FAILURES - a setback is just a setback, nothing more.

TOLERAGE THE FEELING - "no feeling is final" just get through it safely

ACTIONS FIRST, AND FEELINGS WILL FOLLOW - don't wait until you feel motivated. Just start now.

CREATE POSITIVE ADDICTIONS - example: sports, hobbies, AA....

WHEN IN DOUBT, DON'T - if you suspect danger, stay away.

FIGHT THE TRIGGER - take an active approach to protect yourself

NOTICE THE SOURCE - before you accept criticism or advice, notice who's telling it to you.

MAKE A DECISION - if you're stuck, try choosing the best solution you can do right now, don't wait.

DO THE RIGHT THING - do what you know will help you, even if you don't feel like it.

GO TO A MEETING - feet first, just get there and let the rest happen

PROTCECT YOUR BODY FROM HIV - this is truly a life or death issue

PRIORITIZE HEALING - make healthy your most urgent and important goal, above all else.

REACH FOR COMMUNITY RESOURCES - lean on them! They can be a source of great support.

GET OTHERS TO SUPPORT YOUR RECOVERY - tell people what you need.

NOTICE WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL - list the aspects of your life you do control.